Forgiveness seems like a popular topic in my head [and heart] at this time of the year. Of course, the truth is it is BIG most anytime in any year.
I read a friend's post yesterday where she talked about "nursing resentments" and withholding forgiveness as a sort of power play. She was spot on and caused me to look at my own track record in that department.
My Life is one of many broken connections. Some even severed. But I keep on thinkingandfeeling about these people, my part in the breakings, and I keep trying to grow in my capacity to forgive.
The thing is, I keep thinking that I have to DO something or announce my forgiveness in some way for it to "take" and really "work." Oh my...
As I look back on this year and all it has provided me in terms of Life Lessons, I think that BEing Quick to Forgive is one I shall continue to train myself in. I am VERY good at nursing my resentments and oftentimes, seeing the whole of what I have done BEing resentful and holding fast to my unforgiveness, I can only shake my head and BE willing to get better at this stuff.
Right Now.
No more wasting time with whether it is deserved, whether it will BE mutual, or whether anyone even KNOWS I have done it.
Oftentimes it is simply my own silly self I need to forgive.
Need to let off the hook.
Need to BE kinder and gentler and more tender with.
Sometimes I just need to sit myself down with a cup of tea and a little quiet time. And suddenly things shift in perspective.
And others it's about Letting Go my end of that imaginary rope.
1 comment:
I had some events with people that took me years to forgive them. The dumb part is, it only hurt me...for all those years. They never lost one night's sleep over it. Which I felt gave them power over me--because they were still effecting my life. Because I let them. Because I carried those negative emotions around with me all that time...when I didn't need to. Really made no difference to them, anyways. Duh!
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